Moonlight

[Bethany]

I really dont care for this poem, but I felt like giving an example of why I dont do rhyme and flow. This poem is a few year olds actually, I wrote it about a certain boy who was in my life at the time. Try not to be too hard on it... i hate rhyming D:<

The weeping willow sways so light
as we stand on the river bank tonight
something about this feels so right
I could stand here with you 'til daylight

But I know that morning will come soon
the crickets will stop singing their tune
and the sun will overcome the moon
we'll have to leave our love lagoon.

You say I am your first true love
that it was written in the heavens above
we fit together like hand and glove
hand in hand if push comes to shove

You lean in and kiss my cheek
the touch of your lips make my knees weak
love's first kiss, by a secret creek
so gentle, so soft, and oh so meek

I'll always need you, always care
my wall is down, my soul stripped bare.
so pull be close, into my eyes stare
your kisses are heaven, take me there.

[Venus]

That is Gorgeous hun, nothing lifts a soul more than a sweet love.

[morbid]

I refuse to comment on anymore poems due to the face my opinion is differnt from everyone's and I always say the wrong thing apparently :)

[Bethany]

You probably do.. I dont really mind critiquing as long as its open minded... as in, just cause i dont use your preferred method doesnt make me wrong :P

[crimsoninferno]

I refuse to comment on anymore poems due to the face my opinion is differnt from everyone's and I always say the wrong thing apparently :)

Oh stop being so sour...

Anyways, I like it. I am not a particular fan of rhyming very much unless it is done well and I am not saying that this was done badly. Yes, the terms were simple, easy to grasp, but there is nothing wrong with that. Anyways, I like its meaning.

[Bethany]

Oh stop being so sour...

Anyways, I like it. I am not a particular fan of rhyming very much unless it is done well and I am not saying that this was done badly. Yes, the terms were simple, easy to grasp, but there is nothing wrong with that. Anyways, I like its meaning.

Im not a fan of it either. thats why i dont do it much. :P some people can write amazing things and they rhyme and they flow and blady blah blah.. and thats great im just not one of them.

[crimsoninferno]

Im not a fan of it either. thats why i dont do it much. :P some people can write amazing things and they rhyme and they flow and blady blah blah.. and thats great im just not one of them.

Same here. We're not like Mr. Expert of Rhyme and Flow over there. *Juts her chin in Will's direction*